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The things I write on this blog are for more than just being heard.  If I really wanted to be heard I would talk to my like-minded friends and get approval and validation from them.  (Which I do ALL the time.  They are very helpful when I want to feel better about my life.)  Writing here is not about validation for me.  It's about wanting to make a meaningful connection with another human being.

There are times when I'm on Facebook and I'll see a friend's name with a little green dot next to it.  Before I even know what I want to say I already have the little chat window open up and typing some sort of salutation that elicits a response.  After the initial greeting I will usually sit there staring at the little screen, watching the cursor blink, trying desperately to think of more meaningful words to say.  It's not enough to continue on with the meaningless back-and-forth of customary conversational statements that rarely hold the sincerity they sound like they should.  I want to be honest with someone and tell them everything, but I can't find any place to start.

When I started this blog I felt like I had things to say.  I thought I would find people to reach out and make that connection with.  Now I want so bad to keep making that connection, but it feels like nothing is good enough.  I've made a decision that I'm just gonna write.  Sometimes it will be connection worthy, and sometimes it may fall short.  But it will get out there nonetheless, and that's more than half the battle.

~Bridey J.