Spirituality ╪ Religion

Last night at USGA we had a discussion about religion. The thing we all have in common up here at the BYU is we are somehow presently, or before, connected to the LDS church. And just like everywhere else in life when you get a bunch of Mormons together (or just people in general) everyone is going to be at varying degrees in their relationship to the church. Seeing as how we are a people whose very existence seem to contradict their own religion, we thought it would an important topic to address. I'm not gonna lie, I was a bit nervous when this idea came up in our planning meeting. I tend to always think of the worse case scenario, and I was afraid that it would end up being a small attack on the LDS church. But to my joy and relief this was possibly one of the better meetings we've had. I am slightly ashamed that I didn't have more faith in my friends, but I'm happy to have been proved wrong.

Many people in the group still attend church to some extent. Some are still trying to find the balance between these seemingly mutually exclusive halves of themselves. Others have already found harmony inwardly and are now only trying to change the outside to match. While others still are finding it necessary to just step away from the church right now in order to find peace. What gave me hope yesterday was to hear people, with all different feelings about the church, each bear their testimonies of God's love for them, and the truthfulness of the gospel. I saw people talking with each other, and jumping at the chance to ease each other's pain. I felt a type of authenticity and truth I haven't known in a long time. I felt so peaceful in that room, I crave to feel it again.

Dare I say I felt the spirit in a place where it is sometimes encouraged to leave the church? People might find it strange that one can have a testimony of their homosexuality, but the fact is that many of us have felt God's approval of accepting our whole selves. Just because someone may not be close to the LDS church does in no way reflect upon the relationship they have with their Heavenly Father and the personal truths they have felt. All I know is that it has been said that the adversary can imitate a feeling of the spirit, such as a burning in the bosom or intense emotion, but he cannot fake a feeling of peace. And I know what I felt last night was peace.

~Bridey J